Deep Thoughts…

Adventures of a Goddamn Topless Robot – Part 1


So I had almost a years worth of vacation time built up at work that I had to use by the end of September, or I was going to lose it. While most normal people would use this time to go on some exotic/tropical vacation with friends, family, or loved ones, I determined that an even better idea would be ...

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I Hate Stupid People


God people are stupid! I was just at Safeway in the self checkout aisle, and I was ringing up all my food, and right when I’m about to swipe my card some asstarded asian woman comes over and YELLS at me that I scanned my apples wrong?! So she resets my ENTIRE order (is that what you would call it?), ...

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Ninjalove: The Reboot


I’ve ran a blog off and on for pretty much a decade now. The main thing that I’ve noticed in that time is that I love writing, the other thing I’ve noticed is that I lose interest in it very fast if I don’t have anything of interest to write about. It wasn’t such a problem in my 20’s, since ...

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Male Bathroom Etiquette


Mens bathrooms have been far superior to women’s restrooms due to their much faster processing times, although recent incidents have caused me to believe this could change at a moments notice. I fear that the unwritten social contract that all men must abide by, to ensure a steady flow in and out of the men’s room, is no longer universally ...

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The Guilt of Cheating


It started off so innocently. I was laying on my couch, watching a little late night television when it happened. My girlfriend had been out of town the past 2 weeks on a trip, so I was very lonely. I’m not using that as an excuse, because what I did was wrong… but I just couldn’t help myself. It wasn’t ...

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Pictures You Shouldn’t Post


You really have to wonder what some people are thinking when they choose which photos they present to the public. Whether it’s Facebook, or one of the many dating sites out there, I see so many instances of misrepresentation that it makes me curious if these people actually view themselves in the way they’re trying to be perceived by the ...

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Why You’re Single


I find it humorous that so many women feel the need to bitch and moan consistently about being single. For those women that are single because they actually WANT to be single (No, not the ones that only CLAIM they want to be single because they can’t trap a man), you can stop reading now. This is for those single ...

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Starbucks Shitheads


There are few things I can’t live without, and besides boobs, and the NFL (Raiders), coffee is definitely one of them. My favorite place to go is Starbucks, like most of America. I’m not one of those self-righteous douche bags that run around propagating hatred towards Starbucks, because they are a corporate giant. Starbucks is a giant because they are ...

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Valentine’s Day


So apparently Valentine’s Day is coming up here in a few days. I’ve never been one that’s good with dates. I can figure out when Christmas, Halloween, New Years, and the 4th of July are on my own, but that’s about it. I’m not kidding. My sister has to call me every year to remind me when my own mothers’ ...

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Modeling Pictures


Not a day goes by where I don’t find myself asking the question, “Are people really this stupid?” It certainly doesn’t help that I share an office with a complete dipshit, but unfortunately I’ve seen this stupidity popping up for years. So here comes a fun fact ladies, and I’m sorry if this shatters your dreams: You are NOT models ...

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