Operation: Vegan

Operation: Vegan – Day 26 & 27

So this whole vegan kick is quickly coming to a close, and not a moment too soon apparently. Last night I had a dream that I was riding my unicorn through downtown Seattle, and instead of a horn he had a big ass carrot. For some reason I was sitting at a bus stop, which is just madness, since if I had a unicorn I would just fly it around the city, and not take the bus. Where was he supposed to sit? Were they going to tie him to the bike rack?! So anyway, my buddy Brad showed up and started making fun of me for being vegan, and then ATE the damn carrot horn off my unicorn! I was soooooo pissed! Now it just looked like a regular horse… with rainbow stripes (duh). So then we got into a huge argument about it, and I told him I wouldn’t be coming to his St. Patty’s day party one Saturday, SO THEN HE KICKED MY UNICORN! At that point I’d had it, and I ran him over with my trusty steed. Although I didn’t see the body, I certainly killed him… you know how you just know things have happened in dreams, but you don’t remember seeing it? Anyway, fucker got what he deserved.

So I still haven’t figured out what I want to do about Saturday. At first, I was hearing that I would get sick if I jumped right back into meat… then a few more vegans “comforted me” by telling me that I would just get “really constipated.” Oh, awesome… that IS comforting. That’s all I want, to be walking around drunk all day, feeling like I’m packing around a small child that doesn’t quite want to come out just yet. Ugh… well just knowing how powerful and amazing I am, I think I’m going to choose to give it a shot. If it all goes to hell, at least I’ll have something good to write about… seeing as to how so many people take pleasure in my misery.

For day 27 I made some more of my delicious Meatless Black Pepper Steaks, with the rest of the usual suspects. On day 27 I made some BS called Alco Palak that had potatoes, spinach, simmered onions, and some soy. It came out looking like something you’d find in a baby’s diaper, but was actually pretty good. Maybe I just made it wrong, who knows. Tomorrow I’m going to crack open my meatless veggie burgers… SOOOO exciting!! Anyway, enjoy!

Day 26
Day 27

Calories for day 26: 1550 Weight: 188.02
Calories for day 27: 1530 Weight: 187.04

(Fun Facts: Height: 6’0″ / Starting Weight: 197.6)

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