Well, I have officially made it longer as a vegan than my dumbass hippie friend. Suck shit, you flower powered asshole! Also, seeing as to how I’ve made it through my first week with poise, grace, and absolutely no complaining at all, I figured that I now need my own motto to go along with my super hip lifestyle. Not only will this help me in my quest to make fun of everyone who doesn’t make the same food choices I do, but it will also shove in their face how better I am than they are. So now, without further ado, my new vegan motto:
Be neat, don’t eat meat!
Yeah, yeah, don’t act like you’re not impressed. Once this shit hits the web, it’s all over… this is going to spread like wildfire through the Twitter/Facebook world. Pretty soon you’ll be seeing T-shirts, documentaries, movies, and just about everything with this motto on it. Of course, I will be going around suing everyone that steals it, but I had to get rich quick somehow, right?
So one thing I’ve noticed since becoming vegan, especially while I’m surfing the web trying to figure out all of the hip-ass vegan treats, is that people are very defensive and emotional about the food they eat. It’s almost like a religious war going on out there, except it’s a food war! There’s one type of vegan, attacking another type of vegan because they don’t agree on whether vegans can eat honey or not. There’s vegetarians vs. vegans, vegetarians/vegans vs. meat eaters, vegetarians that eat eggs/fish vs. those that don’t. It’s some crazy shit, let me tell ya. Why people honestly care about what other people eat is FAR beyond me. Why people care about what others THINK about the way they eat is even further beyond me. That being said, I think there’s some real potential for a reality tv show here, maybe I’ll sell the idea to the Food Network.
Seeing as to how I tried something new and liked it on day 4, on day 5 I just went absolutely nuts. Instead of my usual sides of corn and beans, I made a mother fucking spinach salad, BITCH!!! I know, right?! The sad part is that the organic, fat free, balsamic vinaigrette I got tasted like absolute cow piss. Not only that, but I tried to get all Fancy Nancy and mixed in some sun dried tomatoes, which apparently aren’t as good raw as they are baked in bagels. That will teach me to try something new. I’m heading to the store tonight to pick up some new dinner suggestions to try, courtesy of my ever-growing number of vegan friends. Until next time, here’s my amazing vegan dinners from the past couple nights.
Calories for day 6: 1464 Weight: 192.06
Calories for day 7: 1518 Weight: 191.06
(Fun Facts: Height: 6’0″ / Starting Weight: 197.6)
As always, DON’T forget to LIKE the fan page for updates on new posts!