Once again, here is a list of things that annoyed me this week, that didn’t really deserve a full post of their own:

1. People that say the word “parentals.” This isn’t 1998, and you’re not Lindsay Lohan starring in The Parent Trap. If you ever star in your own ABC Family – Made for TV Movie, you can sound like a douche then.

2. The guy in my building that answers his phone with “yellow?” Now ends his calls with “Keep on keepin’ on.” Now I really want to kill him!

3. Assholes who talk REALLLLY loud on the phone, so everyone can hear how “important” their conversation is. Trust me, creepy middle aged dude sitting by all the high school girls, if your conversations were really that important, you wouldn’t be sitting in a Starbucks talking on your hot pink, Motorola Razor during office hours.

4. People who say “birfday.” You don’t sound ‘cute,’ you sound like a mentally challenged douche that got punched in the mouth.

5. Morons that use internet lingo in everyday conversation. There is no possible reason that you need to be saying “O.M.G.” or “LOLing!!” You sound like a 15 year old valley girl with the intelligence of salad dressing.

6. My annoying coworker that is now going around claiming she looks like Kristen Stewart. Your face looks like it lost a battle with a pitching machine, and you’re built like a goddamn water buffalo. It might be safer to say you ATE Kristen Stewart, rather than running around telling people that you look like her.